ROASTED BRAVE I AM SPIDERS

Roasted Tarantulas

I sadly admit to loving the reality TV show SURVIVOR - it is fun to watch and imagine how one (aka - ME)- would hold up in such crazy yet perhaps scripted conditions - and so you watch and imagine and yell at the television the CORRECT way to do whatever - build a fire, get along with pompous folk, remember trivia about the enviroment you are living in - bait a hook, skin an eel. NEVER did I imagine I would actually be involved in a "survivor-esque" dare - and yet - there I was past Tuesday - dressed in a Siamese Marie Antionette costume - eating things for a show on the Travel channel - to be aired in October - ranging from ants and grasshoppers to cow's blood and raw lamb kidney to roasted tarantula. I am still recovering. My tongue STILL feels like it is hosting a brigade of fire ants building some outer space structure on my tongue - combined with the element of maybe one thousand wasps stinging the inside of my cheeks. I am indeed better - but any food or drink brings on the wrath of roasted spider. I have researched - I will be fine - yet the only thing I was informed I could NOT eat was the Thai peppers used for decor on the saucer of ants and worms. We could not legally consume in case we blistered out mouths. HMMMMMMMM - first of all - the spicier the better - second of all - I have some inner instinct that spicy stuff HEALS and third of all - where was the legal note about POISON SPIDERS????? I SOOOOOOOOO am not complaining - it was a FANTASTIC, gut-wrenching, daring, once in a lifetime experience and I am super proud for being so bold and digging in - but yet - oh yet - my tongue still hurts - my mouth still burns - and I am hoping the 2008 Chicken Tandorri Experience of new-founded hesitation will pass - I love that dish and yet all I could taste was luke warm guinea pig. (SIGH) I cannot help but think of my life - I am 41 - single (divorced - the ex soon to be all over in the entertainment news - another story - another time - I respect his privacy and soon to be fame and fortune) - menopausal (which means CRAPPY McCRAP weight gain though I work out and eat super spinach salads EVERY DAY) - I have yet to figure out my career - or LIFE - for that matter - and yet - I carry on - consuming spiders and clipping coupons and cheering for the day when I will no longer be sweeping out bugs..........

ROASTED TARANTULA

get a spider - brush on olive oil.
sprinkle sea salt over it
roast at 350 degrees for 35-40 minutes.

Eat in two bites - it TRULY tastes a bit like crab......for real. I have the broken tongue to prove it!